Young Knudsen the original bastard
Why is it always weemen you turds want me to talk about? I'm a ghey man for fuck sake, weemen to me are merely entertainment value with their clothes on, nothing more. Blinding pigeons in the park is more sexual to me than touching durty weemens stinky bits. However, you lot pay my rent so for once I will relent and wax as lyrically as a ghey man can.
I love weemen with their curves and jelly like globes of flesh and moist inviting recesses, waxed entrances and trowled on whale blubber faces. Weemen are also more pleasing to gaze upon than men unless the man is me of course. Obviously Old Knudsen has put his pee pee into a woman once, just once mind. Some washed up bit part actress by the name of Angelina Jolie she was, and very grateful too that I gave up my lunch break to fill her up with old mans cum. To this day she still brings up my only child as I bring up my lunch at the thought of ever sticking my sword into another female flesh pie.
When a woman is interested in you she is most accommodating and will literally bend over backwards and swallow the gravy. As soon as you commit and its a gold ring that gets fingered not a brown one then weemen get too comfortable and their demon side cums out and the flatulence begins. Then its all about picking up clothes, no more wiping snooters on yer trousers and not pissing on the bathroom floor, the things they used to find so adorable about you. The only cure for their emotional snivelling they call "love" is marriage.
Another thing brings out the demon side of weemen and that is their period. Do not trust something that bleeds for 5 days an does not die.
So much complaining about cramps. You know I had my eye hanging out on to my cheek , my left arm was shattered and I had 4 large musket holes in my body as I rode through Chicago into the valley of the shadow of death, no I don't mean having sex with yer Ma I mean the Crimean war and did I complain? No, I was just fucking grateful, weemen don't know they are born.
I've been around weemen long enough to hear the period talk. Weemen talking about gushing, heavy and light flows and sticky itchy yucky goop that cums out off their stench trench.
What ever happened to the dirty talk about licking yer rim as they work the pipe and can my hot friend join us? Gone... all fucking gone. And you wonder why I now worship the cock?
Periods, giving birth and cervical biopsies don't look that sore so why so cranky? I believe its merely an excuse to eat chocolate, fart and stay in bed half the day watching Jerry Springer and his trailer trash following.
Do I constantly talk about my anal itch or my bleeding piles? well ok that's a bad example but really when you scratch and get blood when you should be getting poop, ach you don't understand about suffering.
Vadges should only be talked about in a sexy way or not at all or the wonder is gone. I believe the woes of the world are not violent video games, religious genocide or foods pumped with steroids but are caused by weemen talking about their periods and how special the women become due to the ensuing anger, "LOOK ME IN THE EYES AGAIN AND I'LL CUT YA" . No its not about you its about the hoo hoo.
Its like warm apple pie, yeah right not like mama used to make that's fer sure. Give me a great big cock any day. You haven't lived until you've been rimmed and felched by a bear in a Police unifrom. Thanks to George Michael for the tip! Literally.
I was sat in the tattoo parlour earlier when a butterfly flew past with a picture of a slut on its wing. To quote the great thinker Aristotle, "Men and young boys rule and weemen drool" another great thinker Stephen Hawking may also drool but he talks like a robot which is so fucking cool. The Troll doesn't count as being a man so don't even think about using her as an example.
I encourage the thoughts of my female readers, but not in the comments section, these are reserved for coded messages from my hordes of ghey under age street boys. No doubt there will be lots of talk of womanly things like knitting ,having babies and other delicate subjects, but I like the cock, deal with it.
Take this as constructive criticism now go fetch me a cup of tea then suck on my balls as I watch the telly, CSINSFW Miami is cuming on. I just love how realistic these crime shows are.