Go Natural with Old Stinky

According to new research published in this months Ghey News, people can tell how old you are by how bad you smell.

Research on all age groups rated the 'old person smell' as less intense and less unpleasant than the body odors of straight middle-aged and young un-ghey individuals .......... Not only are young people stupid but they fuckin stink like cat vomit too. Let's not get confused when we talk about old persons stench. The smell of warm piss and cough candy is not to be mistaken for the feral aroma of ghey man meat jizz and a good cabbage phart. Obviously darkies smell worse than the inhabitants of white-world due to the exertion of jumping out of an upstairs window with yer VCR tucked under their arms.

The body odours of non-human animals contain many chemical components that can relate a variety of social information, like a Facebook for dogs. It all keeps coming back to Mary Jane again, huh? Hold on while I just go and pinch off a loaf cos I can feel a turtles head knocking on the back door of my shorts. The trouble with being a 'taker' is that when you need a dump, you need to take a dump immediately cos the thicker the cock up yer hole the weaker the elasticity of the old sphincter.

These human stink chemicals change throughout the life cycle and humans can detect many of them much like other animals to find a suitable mate, identify age, avoid sick people and to tell from friend or foe. Many a time I have had my nose buried nostril deep up a strange dudes hole only to find that I can detect an odor of diabetes, liverwurst, a birthday due, and of course the whiff of fresh warm shite.
Recent interesting research was narrowed to one individual and it was found that because he was so old his odour actually made people aroused, they called this the ' Ghey Knudsen effect.' Weemen it seems wanted to bury their faces into his armpits and would do anything to be with him. Lesbian weemen, nyuk nyuk, Mary Jane again.......  wanted back on the pogo stick as long as it was his.

Strangely enough straight men went ghey for a day and ghey men were um.. like totally ghey.

Research was hampered when Old Knudsen, who did not want to be rude, accommodated many of the other ghey test subjects and ended up smelling like an ancient fishing trawler which had spilt its cargo of KY Jelly all over the deck.

Those old people who can't smell their odor and so douse themselves in horrible perfume don't count, when you get old go natural, the Old Ghey Knudsen way ....... manufactured smells are for the weak as is wiping your butt after a rough Chinese.