Which One Is Fake?

After succesfully downloading 234000 hours of animal porn this weekend I decided it may be time to stop trying to entice small mammals back to my cave. There is only so many bags of chicken feed a man can buy before the postmistress starts to get suspicious. Speaking of chickens, I never voted for this mamma-jammer in the first place. Where I live there are too many of the mojos selling drugs on street corners anyway. Another day of boredom, another day of claiming the dole. I miss America soo much, if only I hadn't touched that small boy on his pee pee.

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Go ahead... shat on me again.